We are the World - We are the Children

 “I wish I was an octopus with tentacles oh so strong

Every duty of my child would be as easy as singing a song

Their needs would be met quickly and with precision

So much time would be saved in making a decision.”

Life with children is challenging and there is no bigger responsibility both physically and mentally, and yet a relationship with a child can bear the greatest rewards.Just when the end of day exhaustion seeps inside my bones and even taking a breath feels like a chore, a mere glimpse of my child with his impish laughter while watching the minion’s movie jolts a sudden bolt of adrenalin into my body.

It’s true that when you birth a baby, you metaphorically grow more limb because God knows you will require super and incredible human powers to raise this marvel.

As parents, we do the best we can to provide physical comforts but seldom look deeper inside the core. Every kid deserves to be taken care of and the opportunity to express how they feel. They need social connection, emotional stability, physical health, varied interests, and a sense of holistic wellbeing. Having said this, our goal in raising children should not be to prevent them from experiencing anxiety or discontentment but rather to give them the tools to manage it.

All parents are habituated to hearing the line “It’s not fair”

The very first line a child might say when you wake him or her up for school"

It is a very light and popular term used by kids of all age groups beginning from when they  learn to express themselves till the time, they just keep chatting nonstop. Is it unfair?

Ignorance was bliss in many ways but now with more power, knowledge and awareness, more responsibilities have arisen. In the western world, ironically the ease and comfort of modern and digital life are disproportionate to the fulfillment of life. The large number of opportunities and competitions that a child has to deal with are rather overwhelming for a tender and developing brain. The challenges that a child must deal with throughout the life cycle are overpowering. Children must deal with physical, emotional, and psychological changes as they grow up. At times, as parents, we often crossover to the other side of parenting by nagging or being overprotective. Studies have shown that these children grow up to become adults who are usually dissatisfied with life and have unrealistic expectations from people around them.

In conclusion, there is no manual, we need not strive to be “Octopus” parents, we only need to be present for them, give them a safe space, teach confidence and empathy along with the importance being disciplined. Children model our behaviour and witnessing our resilience is what teaches them. Resilience is about bouncing back from challenges rather than about not having problems at all.

Perhaps the most essential thing a parent can give their child is the firm belief that his or her presence gives them joy and delight. And if the going gets tough we must humbly seek professional help which goes a long way in taking away fears and insecurities.

To my child ,

I would hold your hand every minute of everyday but I won’t because I know you need to find your own way.

Written by :

Khushi Sahani.(Mindtemple)